Dead Space 2

It seems like it's been quite some time since my last review, and for that, I apologize. Last Sunday was taken up by Soundwave, so that was totally worth it. However, I realise that I may not be able to review alot of games coming out around now, and my back catalogue will only grow.

Anyway, today I'm reviewing Dead Space 2 which is obviously (unless you were dropped on your head as a child) the sequel to Dead Space.

STORY
Dead Space 2 begins in a mental hospital on the Sprawl, a densely populated metropolis built on a shard of Titan, one of Saturn's moons. The game takes place 3 years after the end of the first, and resumes with Isaac Clarke waking up with very little memory of the time that has elapsed. It just so happens that the Necromorph's are attacking the Sprawl, so clearly, it's just not Isaac's day. It soon becomes apparent that Isaac will have to face these monstrosity's alone, while being tormented by his own mind. Hey, he was in an asylum for a reason...

Now, If you have NO idea about what a "Necromorph" is, never fear! Dead Space 2 provides a nifty little "Previously, on Dead Space" cinematic, which sums up the events of the previous title quite nicely. While I've played little more than a demo of the first Dead Space, I found that I had caught up with the story very quickly.

The story itself isn't bad, but it's far from award winning. The plot, as a whole, is fairly predictable, as many times you'll find yourself having to take the long way around because something unforseen went wrong. That is, unforseen by Isaac, not the player. It would take an idiot not to see these plot twists coming.
A few of the characters are quite likeable, though Isaac falls into the cliched action hero role more often than not.

PRESENTATION
Dead Space 2 looks really good, but so did its predecessor. What seperates the two, is a brand new environment, in the form of The Sprawl. While the Ishimura was a dark and uninviting spacecraft, The Sprawl is a metropolis, filled with hospitals, shopping centres and school buildings. While it all takes place in a space station style layout, each area does have its own unique feel. I'll never look at a preschool the same after this game.

While the environments look great, and the characters look quite well made, the Necromorphs just have too much going on. They look far too cluttered to be particularly frightening. This is why I found the ones closer to human form most scary. Speaking of "scary", Dead Space 2 does the usual thing of using high pitch violin squeals to get the player startled, and it works as well as it was ever going to here, even if its been used a bit much over the years.

Oh, and I thought this was worth mentioning; there is NO Heads Up Display. At least, not on the borders of the screen. Instead, you have Isaac's "Rig", which displays your health bar, as well as other meters. Along with this, your weapons laser sight comes directly from the gun, and the ammo count is displayed as a hologram from it. I know some people will find this unimportant, but I thought it was interesting.

GAMEPLAY
Dead Space 2 makes no huge changes from the core gameplay of the original. You run around various blood splattered areas lit by flickering lights and you use some rather heavy duty weaponry to strategically dismember the horde of disgusting alien zombie things. Now, the "horror" element of this action horror game pretty much gets thrown out the window when you get given guns that can slice the heads of five aliens in one shot. It works well enough, but it detracts from the overall scariness of the game.

Yes, I jumped a few times, but that was more from surprise than being genuinely scared. Also, the Necromorphs are cheap bastards. More often than not, you'll find yourself facing off against two monstrosities, then a third will drop from the roof vent and claw off your man bits.

The most unsettling bit of Dead Space 2 has to be the fact that your ammo and med-packs are scarce, and this is what horror games should be, conserving your shots if you can because, before you know it, you'll have to start smacking the necromorphs to death with the least lethal part of your gun.

Now, when you aren't blowing the limbs off aliens with huge guns, you're probably solving puzzles with your stasis and kinesis modules. The puzzles aren't the most complex things, but the features themselves are pretty cool. Stasis lets you freeze enemies/objects and kinesis allows you to pick things up, which is helpful when your ammo is gone.

Oh, and there are some trippy zero gravity bits. They were a nice touch and they add some much needed change to the gameplay. The use of thrusters, in conjunction with Stasis and Kinesis makes for some interesting segments in the game.

REPLAYABILITY
First of all, once you finish the single player game, you are able to restart, on a higher difficulty with all your previous gear available to you from the first vendor. That's kind of interesting, but it certainly didn't make me want to do it again. Though, that's just me; theres tonnes of audio and text logs to convey some more of the somewhat interesting story to players who want more.

As for multiplayer, Dead Space 2 adds a Left 4 Dead-esque game mode, where 4 players control humans and 4 players control necromorphs. The human players have to complete an objective, whereas the necromorphs just have to kill the humans. At the moment, it's pretty unbalanced, but can be fun on occasion. I say, go buy L4D and play a more refined version of this mode. Dead Space 2 didn't impress me with it's multiplayer.

OVERVIEW
Dead Space 2 isn't a bad game. It's environments have a lot more variety to them compared to the first Dead Space and some of it's characters are interesting and some are even likeable. The story is a bit weird, but I can accept that a few people can get into it. It was nothing, if not interesting. If anything, my main problem was the gameplay. A horror game can't be that scary if you keep giving players an arsenal that would make Bulletstorm blush. I'm just saying.


Next time on Tophat Gamer, I plan on reviewing Killzone 3. Or Bulletstorm. You guys should vote on it. Not that you will. Oh well. See you next time!

DC Universe Online

Ok, first thing's first. DC Universe Online is my first MMORPG. I don't just mean the first I've reviewed, I mean my first EVER. With the possible exception of Runescape. So bear with me, while I muscle through my first MMORPG review. Hopefully it turns out ok, and tells you all exactly what you need to know. Lets get to it.

STORY
DCUO begins with an astonishing cinematic, detailing how exactly everyone gets superpowers. It starts with a bang as we see Villains fighting heroes in an all out war and as the fighting dies down, Lex Luthor gains the upper hand, effectively killing Superman. As the victory sinks in, Luthor looks to the skies, as a Braniac invasion fleet blacks out the sun. It's as epic as it sounds.
We then learn that this was a possible future, and that "Future Lex" travels back in time to give the Heroes and Villains of today a fighting chance, by delivering the exobytes; tiny bug-like machines that hold the superpowers of a destroyed future.

This basically sets us up for DC Universe Online. You're one of the many ordinary people infected by the super-power bestowing exobytes, and the game sends you on various missions to help save or enslave the world.
The story is fittingly comic-booky, with storylines that seem ripped right from the pages of the famous comics.

PRESENTATION
The art style of DCUO is far from the awesome that was Arkham Asylum, and has a nice comic book style for all its characters and locations. The superpowers all look pretty awesome, and they really help to personalize your character. On the subject of "your character", the creation/customization options aren't as varied as, say, City of Heroes/Villains. The trade off here is having licensed heroes in your game; and that's not to say the creation is lacking either. It's just not AS extensive as CoH.
The voice acting varies from outstanding (in the form of Mark Hamill and Kevin Conroy as The Joker and Batman respectively) to annoying (mainly due to the NPC civillians who just keep saying the same 1 or 2 lines). The soundtrack is rather fitting, with the epic brass instruments everytime you exit a safehouse as a hero.

Accompanying all of this are little hand-drawn cutscenes to round off the end-quest instances. The voice acting in them is immaculate and the art is always interesting and cool in it's own way (seeing a gorilla-formed Flash, or Joker-toxin infected Batman in villains own thoughts).

Sometimes theres some graphical or sound hitches, but its early days yet, and if theres anything awesome about MMORPG's, its that they're constantly being updated.


GAMEPLAY
The gameplay of DCUO follows the usual MMORPG trend of "Go to mission start, go kill X amount of enemies, Collect x amount of Y, go to mission end". That's fine, its expected; but theres a strange shortage of missions between level 1 and level 30 (cap). The end-game content is all rather compelling, but most of it requires you to team up, and for some players, that's just not their style.

For those of whom that do like the social interaction part of MMO's, there are a variety of Alerts (group instances), Raids, Duos (2 man instances) and a range of PVP modes, including Legends, which allows you to take the role of a licensed DC character.

This seems all pretty standard to me, so what sets DCUO apart from the competition is the combat system. More suited towards a controller, the game takes a more Action RPG approach to combat. This means each button press equals an attack and theres a larger sense of involvement (for me at least).
I did notice something a bit off with the gameplay, however. Usual MMORPG's have you fit into a role; Healer, Damage dealer, Tank or what have you. While DCUO does feature these roles, the power sets for each of them seem too similar to make it feel as though your role is having a huge impact like it would in, say, WoW. You feel a bit less special, and a lot more interchangeable.

REPLAYABILTY
Once you reach the (somewhat low) level cap of 30, theres a buttload of end-game content to do in the form of instances, raids and duos. Along with that, theres a whole lot of exploration to do, with feats/milestones available to show off what random thing's you've done. Loot is always a big plus for games like this, and a big reason why people will be playing past the cap is for the Iconic armour sets. There are 3 for each mentor, and I gotta say, they are stunningly cool. Can't wait to get my House of El warsuit.

OVERVIEW
Are you a hardcore MMORPGer? DCUO may be missing alot of the detail that you're used to. If you're a fan of comics (DC in particular) you can't go wrong with this. Besides, it's not like you have to pay for more of a subscription than you want.

A side note, if you buy for the PC, you get the usual added bonuses such as faster loading times and better graphics, but at the cost of combat awesomeness. For PS3 users, loading times can get a bit tedious, but your controller will be your best friend in DCUO.
Oh, and I hope you have an HDTV... the chat text is so small, it strained my eyes like nothing else. The difference is absolutely huge. And voice chat seems to have some bugs. At the moment. Lets not forget that it's early days yet.

Side side note: Best move ever, crushing an enemy with a flaming meteor, then throwing it at a bunch of other enemies. Awesome.

Phew! that was a big one. And I doubt I covered alot of it anyway. But I believe that's more than enough for you guys to make an informed decision. See you next time!

LittleBigPlanet 2

Last year, when I posted a retrospective of Little Big Planet, I was so excited for its upcoming sequel. And now that its out, I have to say... I'm 100% satisfied with the final product; which is a rare thing when a game is hyped up as much as this.
LittleBigPlanet 2 is the sequel to 2008(?)s PS3 exclusive, LittleBigPlanet; a game based off of user generated content. LBP2 continues this style of Play, Create, Share.

STORY
LittleBigPlanet 2 begins with sackboy being abducted by an evil monster that looks like a giant Vacuum cleaner, known as the Negativitron. As the Negativitron attempts to trap Sackboy, rescue arrives in the form of Larry Da Vinci and Avalon Centrifuge, the apparent "leaders" of The Resistance.
The game follows Sackboys recruitment into the Resistance and their efforts to rid Craftworld of the Negativitron.

The story of LBP2 exceeds the original's approach in so many ways. More memorable characters, plus actual cutscenes and voice acting give the game a lot more character, while retaining the charm it always had. As well as that, the story actually gives you a more focused experience, introducing the Antagonist from the beginning, rather than tacking him on near the end; like the Collector in LBP1.

The story is really quite funny, and using the in-game tools to create the cutscenes, Media Molecule made it possible to insert some much needed drama into the game.


PRESENTATION
LittleBigPlanet 2 returns with the style that made it so charming and memorable in the first place; the entire landscape has a handcrafted feel to it, which gives the levels themselves almost as much character as the actual characters.
Sound design is perfectly executed in this sequel; the various soundtracks all fit perfectly with the levels, and they all have a sense of playfulness to them, no matter how ominous or grand it may sound.

A big departure from the storytelling of its predecessor, LBP2 features fully voiced cutscenes, made with the in-game creation tools. The voice actors in the story made the characters their own, and much of the dialogue is why I enjoyed the story scenes so thoroughly.

The game itself looks substantially better than the last, with Media Molecule polishing the game engine to a mirror shine. Everything looks and sounds better than the original.


GAMEPLAY
Gameplay inside the main story levels of LBP2 remain largely unchanged since the original; most levels revolve around directing sackboy from one end of the level to the other, using basic platforming techniques as you go. New gadgets such as the grabinator and the graqppling hook spice up the gameplay, as do devices like the controllinator (which allows sackboy to take control of any vehicle/object with controls mapped to the controller).

A word of caution, however: the "floaty" jumping controls of LBP1 have not been adressed, so if you're one of those people who will miss out on an amazing gaming experience because of some extremely minor detail like that, LBP2 will not change your stance on it. You didn't like the jumping in the original, you won't like it now. Just saying.

Now, anyone who played the original will know that "play" is only 2 parts of the equation. 1 part story, 1 part community play; but what's the 3rd part? The 3rd is "Create", which allows any player to make almost anything using the creation tools. The tools are robust enough to make anything you want, but simple enough to start on something small for those of you who are creatively challenged.

The creation tools are so robust that we've seen top-down racers, side-scrolling shooters, first-person shooters and fighting games. For anyone well versed in the create tools, the only limitation to your creations will be your imagination.

REPLAYABILITY
So what happens when you finish the story and you're done with creating? Well, if you've gone back and aced all the levels, collecting everything there is to collect, then it's time for you to jump online and experience what other people are sharing. Or if you'd like, share some of your own stuff. LBP was one of the only games I've continually played since its release, and I foresee LBP2 being played on and on and on, because the level library is always expanding.

The addition of competitive multiplayer games to the mix makes this title even more fun with friends, both locally and cooperatively. Be sure to try the basketball game. It's amazingly addictive.

Oh, and if you happened to waste your money on PS Move, or WiiHD as it's been dubbed, then it also comes with Sackboys prehistoric moves. Haven't played it, but free stuff is always nice, right?

OVERVIEW
I don't want to sound like a rabid PS3 fanboy here, but if you don't own a PS3, this is the reason for you to get one. Don't get put off by the childish vibe, just do it. You won't regret it. For those of you who played the original, you need to pick this up. LBP2 is exactly what a sequel needs to be; polished presentation, natural evolution of gameplay and simplified, yet robust creation tools make this an amazing title to own.


Next week, my first MMO, DC Universe Online. Should be interesting. I'll see you next time!

Metal Gear Solid: Peacewalker

Another week, another PSP game to review. Just got back from New Zealand, and any time I wasn't chilling with family or friends, I was reading or playing my PSP, an activity that seems so much more enjoyable thanks to last weeks game, and now Metal Gear Solid: Peacewalker.

STORY
MGS: Peacewalker is set 10 years after Metal Gear Solid 3, and players take control of the legendary soldier known as Big Boss once again. After executing his former mentor and averting nuclear war between the USA and USSR, Big Boss (though preferring the codename "Snake") has begun his own Military nation, Militaires Sans Frontieres (Military Without Borders) and is hired by a client to rid Costa Rica of an occupying force, suspected to be the C.I.A.

The story follows MGS tradition with a well written, yet overly complicated story. Though not the most convuluted in the series, it definitely needs some kind of an editor. Otherwise, the story is quite entertaining and brings the wide range of emotions that Metal Gear games are known for.

Characters are well written, and Big Boss is really well developed as a character. For those of you who haven't played Snake Eater, a warning; spoilers occur in Peacewalker, so try to play Snake Eater first.

PRESENTATION
Along with Ghost of Sparta, Peacewalker is one of the best looking and sounding games I've ever had the pleasure of playing. Though not as slick and smooth as their HD, console counterparts, both games have magnificent voice acting and musical scores that set the tone for the game.
MGS fans should expect no less than the usual amount of awesome that is packed into the standard Metal Gear game.

David Hayter and Lori Alan return in thier roles from Snake eater, and are accompanied by a cast of interesting voices that add a lot of depth to the games main characters.
While the game may not look as good as its PS3 counterpart, it pretty much equals its late PS2 counterpart, which is fitting, seeing as it follows on from it story-wise.


GAMEPLAY
Peacewalker is the usual Metal Gear formula of sneaking and gunfighting, which works fairly well on the system provided. The controls are certainly more fitted to sneaking than anything else, but the lack of a 2nd analog stick affects this too. The camera is a bit awkward to position, using the face buttons instead of a second stick.
The problem with this is, while sneaking, you want to see as much as possible around you. Conversely, while gunfighting, this system doesn't provide the best accuracy possible, and sometimes makes the action sequences seem like a chore.

A variety of items and weapons can be gathered, allowing you to play your way, whether that be sneaking, rambo-style, or a mix of the two. These weapons and items are retrieved through a management-like minigame where you hire soldiers and assign them to teams within your army, whilst sending soldiers out on missions, or capturing new recruits or vehicles.
I gotta say, as fun as the main gameplay was, I found it almost as fun to just mess around with my teams, sending them into battle, rearranging soldiers, firing and recruiting all the time. It was honestly quite fun.

My biggest problem, and it may be a small problem, is that it was a rather short affair. For a Metal Gear game at least. And the boss battles lacked the flair that Peacewalkers' console counterparts almost always contained. Instead of fighting highly characterized, interesting people, it's always a mech or vehicle of some description. What a shame.

REPLAYABILITY
Though the story seems a bit short, it may be due to the fact that each of its chapters is split into around 10 missions. This allows for players to go back and attempt to better their score on a previous mission. It also encourages players to search through previously played missions for new goodies to take back to Mother Base.
This, along with the management side of Mother Base, gives players a fairly large amount of replayability, especially for a PSP title.
Along with main story missions, there are Outer Ops missions, performed by members of the MFS, as well as co-op missions to be played with up to 3 other friends. The PSP has never been known for its replayability, until now.

OVERVIEW
Were you disappointed when it was announced that the next MGS game would be based around Raiden and his ninja abilities? If so, this is the game for you. The next true sneaking/action game is on the PSP and it's name is Peacewalker. Nothing against Raiden, but if you're more into the traditional MGS experience, Big Boss has got you covered on the Playstation Portable. Despite not meeting a few of the standards of previous games (awesome boss battles, long game-time) Metal Gear Solid: Peacewalker is an entertaining, well presented, epic sounding masterpiece in portable form.


Thats it for this week, next week it'll be LittleBigPlanet2. Also, just wondering, should I get DC Universe Online? It's about 20 bucks a month for the subscription, and I'd be new to MMORPG's. Anyway, I'll see you next time!

God Of War: Ghost of Sparta

A couple of years ago, while on holiday, I played a game that raised my expectations of the Playstation Portable. This game was God of War: Chains of Olympus, and two years later, I find myself in a similar situation; on holiday with a fantastic PSP game. It’s only fitting that the game should be yet another entry into the God of War series.

STORY
With the story of Kratos at an end via the PS3’s magnificent God of War 3, this PSP title takes us back to the days between the first and second games. Kratos has just defeated Ares and claimed his throne, but is still haunted by the visions that the gods had promised to relieve him of.
However, these aren’t the usual visions of his murdered wife and child that he normally sees. These visions concern his long thought dead brother, Deimos. The game follows Kratos’ attempts to learn the truth behind his brother’s fate and his subsequent efforts to save him.

With the God of War series already concluded, I doubted whether or not Ghost of Sparta could be fit into the established canon. My doubts were unfounded, however, when I found that the game often nods to the final game of the series, while being a truly entertaining tale all on its own. I found Kratos to be at his most relatable in this story (although that may not be saying much about Mr. Murder himself).

PRESENTATION
The presentation of Ghost of Sparta can be summed up in one sentence, which is “I couldn’t believe the PSP could handle such slick, fluid graphics and animations, as well as provide the same epic soundtrack and voice acting as in the console games.
While the areas and puzzles provide some variety, the enemies in this game leave something to be desired. More often than not, each area consists of the same 5 types of enemies, but all with a different colour or something.
God of War 3 got my GOTY award for best soundtrack, and that same work shines on the PSP, assuming you have some good headphones to listen to it with. The PSP’s speakers just don’t seem to cut it.

GAMEPLAY
God of War: Ghost of Sparta brings the same hack and slash gameplay from the consoles to the compact screen of the PSP, with very little lost in translation. Combo’s are as fluid as ever, and seem like some kind of fiery ballet of doom, whereas Kratos also acquires some cool magic, ranging from the Eye of Atlantis’ lightning strike, to the Horn of Boreas’ freezing attacks.
Add to this a very cool weapon combo known as the Arms of Sparta, as well as an always present “Fire meter” for adding an extra spice to your usual attacks, and you have one of the most varied combat systems in the God of War Series to date.

Quick time events make a return, but as with GOW3, the symbols appear on the corresponding sides of the screen, meaning that the action takes centre stage ALWAYS. I’ve never really disliked the God of War QTE’s, simply because they never really catch you off guard. As an always present feature of the series, they’re expected, and lead to some really awesome parts of the games.

Gameplay problems are minor, but sometimes keep popping up, each time becoming more and more annoying. For instance, the choice to map the dodge control to the two shoulder buttons often makes the game feel awkward to play effectively. On top of this, some of the larger enemies (cyclops’ in particular) sometimes block the screen, obstructing the view of Kratos and occasionally of some smaller enemies.

REPLAYABILITY
The replay value of Ghost of Sparta is quite similar to every other God of War game. The original playthrough unlocks the hardest difficulty, and subsequent playthroughs can unlock extra media. The challenge of the gods returns and is as tough as ever whereas a new feature, The Temple of Zeus, is the users way of buying bonus content with XP Points.
Aside from that, the replay value is limited. There’s very little to find through exploration, aside from the various skill augmenting items, or experience orb chests. The sole replayability of GOW:GOS comes mainly from the Challenge of the Gods.

OVERVIEW
While not the longest game out at the moment, it’s challenging and entertaining enough to rival many popular games, some of the handheld variety, but many found on consoles. Its certainly a strange day when I choose to play a PSP game over a console game, but Ghost of Sparta may be good enough to do that.
The interesting story, and familiar, yet streamlined gameplay overshadow the minor problems, and the game continues with the usual God of War style, which is well and truly EPIC. It’s just epic on a smaller screen.


I'd like to apologize to any readers out there who have missed me (coz theres soooo many of you...) and I'll be back in full force after next Sunday. Next Sunday will hopefully be my Metal Gear Solid Peace Walker review, which will give me a week with LittleBigPlanet 2. Hopefully followed by Mass Effect 2 (PS3). See you next time!

Donkey Kong Country Returns

Once again, Nintendo is back to whipping all its Original I.P's into the ground with constant sequels and reboots. While not really a bad thing, it's always nice to see something new come up. And here we have... Donkey Kong Country Returns. Fantastic. A reboot of a classic SNES title. I wonder where they got that idea?... Oh wait.. Nintendo have already done that for Mario. Silly me.

STORY
Under the hypnotic powers of Tikis from the Tiki Tak Tribe, the animals of DK Island have stolen Donkey Kongs bananas and, obviously, the giant ape is pissed the fuck off. When did people think it was a good idea to steal I giant gorillas bananas?!
Anyway, the story follows Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong as they try to reclaim the stolen yellow fruit.

I would go on and on about how boring the story is, but lets face it... Nintendo don't have the mental capacity to write good stories, let alone come up with enough bad ones to retire the old ones. We see it in almost every Mario game, and we're seeing it here too. Best not to dwell on it, yea?
The story is good enough to give us a reason to play the game, but not enough to make us care about anything, really.

PRESENTATION
Donkey Kong Country Returns sticks to its 2D roots but, much like New Super Mario Bros. Wii, the game featrues fairly slick 3D graphics. Coupled with this however, are the occasional levels with different art styles. For example, one level seemed to have a limbo-inspired silhouette style, which factored into the gameplay too.

The memorable music from the original make a return as well, and the sound effects are as memorable as ever. My one major problem with the presentation is that there weren't really enough of the visually interesting levels to keep the game interesting.


GAMEPLAY
DKCR features classic side-scrolling platforming that would familiar to anyone who played the original. The wii-mote + nunchuk can be used, but many players will opt to just have the wii-mote held sideways. The controls are simple enough so that even the most basic of vine-swingers will navigate the levels with ease.

I do have one big problem with the controls, and it was the same with New Super Mario Bros. Wii. The addition of motion controls to this game are completely unnecessary. You don't want to be running through a level, only to have to shake your controller to attack a specific enemy. It breaks the immersion for me, and I'm sure I'm not the only one.

Donkey Kong Country Returns does change up the side-scrolling format occasionally with rocket barrels, visual styles that impact the gameplay and some occasional jumping from mid-ground to foreground to background. It's these things that keep the game from becoming stale.

REPLAYABILITY
DK Country Returns features several challenges for each level, including finding puzzle pieces, letters of the word KONG and time trials to beat. Every level can also be played in co-op with the 2nd player as Diddy Kong. Aside from that, the game doesn't hold much replay value, but hey, its a fun game without it!

OVERVIEW
While I am a bit sick of Nintendo just pooping out sequels and reboots of their most overused properties, I did find myself enjoying DK Country Returns quite alot. It has a lot of humour for a game without a script, and it honestly looks really good, even for a Wii game. The addition of motion controls was fucking moronic, even if it plays a small role; but it doesn't really affect the awesomeness that was DK Country Returns. This is one for the nostalgia freaks AND new gamers alike.

O.K guys, I'm off to the new house, and then off on holiday. If I'm able to, I'll post a review over there, if not, see you next month!

Kane and Lynch 2: Dog Days

Now, my back catalogue of games has been huge for some time now. Thats the problem with not getting paid to do this. Kane and Lynch 2 has been in there for a couple of months now (4 I believe) but now its time to get down to business. Is it intense, gritty and realistic? More to the point, is it good?

STORY
Kane and Lynch 2 follows the story of two career criminals who are past thier prime (if they ever had one). Lynch is living in Hong Kong with his new love Xiu, whilst still doing some dirty work for the local organized crime syndicate. Lynch calls Kane for aid in a risky deal, in return for a cut of the money. The shit hits the fan after Lynch kills the daughter of an extremely important man, and Kane and Lynch are soon fighting for their lives.

The story that IO interactive are trying to tell isn't necessarily a bad one, its just executed poorly. Unless you've played the first game, you don't really understand why Lynch is in Hong Kong, or whats going on with the whole "Kane's daughter" sub plot. Some parts of the story just seem absolutely retarded as well, one such moment occurs when, instead of using a single well guarded car to transport Kane and Lynch, the local authorities decide to take a fleet of high powered choppers. What the Fuck?

PRESENTATION
The visuals in this game are pretty terrible, to be completely honest. Yea, the character models and animations are smooth, but whats the point of that if it looks like everythings filtered through the shittiest handheld camera imaginable. Everythings all hazy and all the lights emit this massive bar across the screen. And they blurred out all the nudity! I get that IO interactive were going for something different to emphasise the sheer ugliness of the situation, but that doesn't stop the game from still looking crap.

The voice acting is bland and uninteresting, and the Asia pop soundtrack is just annoying (in the menu screen at least; i forgot how the rest of the soundtrack sounds). As far as I can see, theres really not much in the way of redeeming factors for Kane and Lynch 2's presentation.

GAMEPLAY
With such lackluster story and presentation, one would hope that the gameplay would be Kane and Lynch 2's high point. And although that may be correct, that really isn't saying much. Dog Days is based around cover-based combat and while that works fine, it's really, really boring!

Yes, games like Gears of War and Uncharted have done this before, but each of those had their own unique flavour of cover-based combat. GOW had awesome, devastating weapons, whereas Uncharted had more verticality to it due to the platforming. What does Kane and Lynch have?.... Honestly, theres nothing new or interesting here.

Not only is it boring, but the controls are awkward. Who the hell puts a sprint button on the shoulder of the controller? Also not helping the gameplay is the crap presentation. Its difficult to shoot something that you can't see clearly thanks to bars of light across the screen.
This may sound like im nitpicking now, and thats probably because I am. Not because I hate Kane and Lynch, oh no. I honestly wanted to like this game, but its almost impossible to actually enjoy it. I'm nitpicking because I want to make this as long as an average review.

REPLAYABILITY
Kane and Lynch 2: Dog Days has a number of trophies/achievements to earn, but why you would bother is beyond me. It also features multiplayer, and It's probably the one redeeming factor of the game. Modes like fragile alliance are co-operative heists with a twist. At any moment, you or your team mates are able to gun down and betray the others, stealing more money for yourself.
While the concept is actually pretty cool, the gameplay once again slams it back down to Earth.

OVERVIEW
Don't buy it. For the love of god, it's better left at the bottom of the bargain bin. Hell, the only way I would suggest you get this game, is if someone is ACTUALLY PAYING YOU TO TAKE IT. Sure, I may be over reacting. Some people may appreciate the handy cam approach to visuals. And some people might actually enjoy the lackluster story. And yes, the cover-based combat is as solid as it was ever going to get. But really? Aren't there better games based off that same mechanic? For the love of god, go buy uncharted or Gears of War, or something!!!!

Stay tuned for my Donkey Kong Country Returns review. Just FYI, I'm posting these because I'm moving house tomorrow, and wont have the internet for about 10 days. And in 11 days, I'm flying to NZ, so this is my holiday fro reviewing. If I'm lucky enough to get near a computer while in NZ I'll be sure to post something.
See you next time!
P.S. Happy New Year!